Wow, can anyone else not believe it's June?? When I was little, I remember feeling like time moved soooo sloooowly. Now, it flies. Does this mean I'm getting old?
I had a lovely Saturday. My friend and I worked at a food pantry in downtown College City for a few hours this morning. It was a lot of mindless packing, organizing, bagging, scanning, etc. which I actually really enjoyed. It was nice to just turn off my brain and do something tangible and useful. The guys that worked there were definitely characters - super funny and friendly and welcoming. We had such a good time that we're planning to go back next weekend, especially since it seemed like the extra hands were much appreciated.
We ended up staying at the food bank through lunch. I had packed a snack, but never found the "right" time to eat it. And honestly, I was so busy and distracted that I never got very hungry. After we left, I was planning to come home and eat my typical lunch but then suddenly, for some reason, I just didn't want to. My same old boring sandwich just seemed so unappetizing in my head. So I suggested we walk over to this nice lunch place near our apartment that I've been meaning to try since freshman year. Spontaneous eating - check! It was so good. So satisfying. I was full in a warm, delicious, good way. Now I'm having the typical guilt from breaking routine and eating more than usual, but such is life.
Speaking of food, I saw my dietician J yesterday morning for the first time in over a month. Overall, it was a pretty positive session, at least compared to past ones. I think that was because I was, for the first time in a long time, ready to actually commit and engage. We wrote out a new meal plan (since I hadn't been compliant with the old one in, um, a while) and I found myself agreeing to it not just outwardly, but inwardly as well. Some of the stuff is definitely going to be a struggle, but I really feel like my head is in a good place to tackle it.
This newfound motivation still feels a little strange, but I'm going with it. That's good, right? Promise me this is gonna be worth it? I'm going to keep putting it in writing so you guys can hold me accountable and I don't chicken out: Gaining weight is good. It's okay to eat. I'm done being sick.