Totally bizarre day. First, it was frigid, which made the pipes to my washing machine freeze. I actually noticed this last night, but the maintenance guy came this morning in the middle of my breakfast (and I do NOT enjoy being interrupted/watched while eating). So I had to get ready for work with a stranger in my apartment. Then I went to therapy, kicked it with Dr. P for an hour, and came outside to find my car wouldn't start. Called AAA, waited (ahem made my mother entertain me on the phone) for over an hour until the tow truck came. Then I had to leave my car at the mechanic, walk home (about 2 miles), get my stuff, walk to work (another mile-ish), then walk BACK to the mechanic. Did I mention it was FRIGID? So I got my car and drove home, where I found that the maintenance man had ripped a hole in my laundry room wall and was blasting a space heater into it to thaw the pipes. Plus he had traipsed mud everywhere.
But the weird thing is, I'm fine. Remember how I sank into a pretty gloomy mood for a couple weeks last month, then seemed to sort of shake it off (SHAKE IT OFF!) for the couple weeks I was at my parents' house? Well, it seemed like the gloominess had rolled back in pretty much as soon as I got back to College City; there were a couple days earlier this week where I was basically on the verge of losing it every second, like I could've burst into tears and cried for hours if I'd let myself. But then, somehow, that gloominess seemed to lift. Yesterday I got home from work, made dinner, called my mom, read my book, watched TV, and didn't feel like crying. Today I got hit with one crisis after another, trekked through the brutal cold, had a boring shift at work, and didn't feel like crying. Got home tonight to a huge mess in my apartment, a slight headache, and a boring/stressful project for my advisor, and I still don't feel like crying. Weird, but I'll take it!
Anyway. My pipes are still frozen and my car may or may not start tomorrow morning, depending on how low the temperature gets overnight. I think the universe is telling me to head south.
You know what hit me when I read this post Kaylee
ReplyDeleteThat these are 'life problems'
Problems that happen to every hard working decent citizen
Your problems used to be trying to stay alive
And generally not die
But now your problems are like anyone else's
And that to me is huge progress
Plus that fact that you handled things beautifully
I hope I am saying this right
And you know what I mean
Congratulations Kaylee
You are now a 'normal' person
With 'normal problems'
Ps: This was all said with only love for you x
Ruby I had the same thought! And you know what's crazy, I remember a couple years ago when I was very deep in my eating disorder and in so much pain from the nerve problems, I used to wish like crazy that I could just have "normal" problems - like car trouble or a breakup or a bad hair day. That stuff just seemed so simple and manageable and beautifully NORMAL. So yes, I'm trying to appreciate the fact that I finally got my wish :)
DeleteI got out of Illinois just in time to avoid the true polar vortex. The lowest it got while I was there was maybe 5, which is still damn cold! I'm a California girl, so it was hard. Right now, where my parents are, it's colder than it is on Mars. Crazy.
ReplyDeleteUgh it is SO cold. I am from the east coast, which has sort of similar weather to the midwest but way less extreme (not as hot in the summer, not as cold in the winter). Six years here and I'm still not used to it..
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