Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Rejection and Now What?

Well, I suppose the rheumatologist wasn't a TOTAL stranger, since I'd known her for twenty-five minutes before she rejected me. But the Bank of America rep was definitely a stranger when he rejected me for a credit card within six seconds of answering the phone.

Yes, I saw a rheumatologist this morning, at long last—it took a million pushy phone calls, hours waiting on hold, and lots of printing/copying/faxing records. Only had to wait three months for the appointment, but I figured they would at least find something treatable that might explain all the awful symptoms I'm having—pain, fatigue, dry eyes, infections, and migraines. But no. I spent twenty minutes answering questions and going over my past lab results with the doctor, then she left the room to consult with the chief resident, who came in to inform me that my problems are not rheumatology-related.

Well, great. Really glad I went to all this trouble to get the appointment. I mean, in all seriousness, it is good news that have no autoimmune or connective tissue disorders (e.g. lupus, Sjogren's, or rheumatoid arthritis). But who the fuck else am I supposed to see now? I don't have a primary care doctor because they all just refer me out to specialists, who are all baffled. The rheumatologist suggested the next step might be an allergist/immunologist to see if there might be a problem there.

In the meantime, any and all thoughts—no matter how crazy—are welcome. I have no idea where to go from here. Is there even an underlying systemic issue? Hormone issue, immune system issue, metabolic/thyroid issue...or do I just have the worst luck ever, and have managed to accumulate multiple distinct, rare, unrelated conditions? Is it just a matter of having abused my body for too long by starving and running and not sleeping, and now I'm paying the price? The gynecologist I saw last week (a wonderful guy, but not super knowledgable about pelvic pain disorders) recommended a speciality pain clinic in Big City a few hours from here, which is a drive I'd definitely be willing to make if it seemed worth it, but of course the wait time for an appointment is 3-6 months.

I'm just really not making it. My work hours now are flexible enough that I can nap pretty much every day, but I'm starting school in five weeks and my schedule is going to change dramatically. Advil, Tylenol, and Aleve no longer work for my headaches, and I've occasionally resorted to the leftover Vicodin from my wisdom tooth surgery....probably not smart, but I'm at a loss.

ARGH. Sorry, didn't mean to make this so negative and I probably shouldn't post after doctors' appointments anyway, since I will invariably be in a foul mood. But I don't talk about this with people in real life, and sometimes I just need to spew in frustration.

1 comment:

  1. Yikes. I can't imagine how frustrating this is, and you don't deserve it at all. I hope you manage to find answers and solutions soon...hang in there, thinking of you.