Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Rainy Day Thoughts

(It has just occurred to me that I recently wrote another post about a snowy day...I guess my thought processes are largely influenced by the weather.)

Anyway, it is raining today. Pouring, actually, which I am not pleased about. I do not like rain one bit. I hate feeling like my clothes and shoes and hair are damp all day long. In high school, there were some girls on my cross country team who loved running in the rain, which I never understood. It's slow and messy.

Medication update: It's been a couple weeks now, and most of the side effects are subsiding. I've gotten past the overwhelming nausea, meaning I don't feel like puking all the time. My sleep is also better - at first, I was having some problems with insomnia (waking up at about 3 a.m. and not being able to go back to sleep), but that seems to be resolving itself. Over the weekend, I slept ten hours straight both nights, which is unheard of for me; I usually get by on about five or six. So now I'm mostly caught up and don't feel like a zombie anymore.

On the weight front, I haven't gained or lost any. About a week ago, I was super bloated and the scale went up a couple pounds, but I realize now that that was probably PMS. My appetite is virtually nonexistent lately, but my appetite has been completely unpredictable for months anyway so this most recent variation may not be related to the drug at all.

Most importantly, my mood is so much better. Like, worlds better than it was two or three weeks ago. R said the medication probably wouldn't start to work until I'd been taking it for 4-6 weeks, but that it was possible for me to be feeling the effects already. Granted, my life and schedule have changed dramatically for the better over the past couple of weeks (back in school, friends around, no longer alone in my apartment, got my period) so that could be contributing to the change, but I'm not complaining either way. My anxiety levels are much lower too, but that could be a result of me having more activities and distractions.

Bottom line: I'm doing well. I don't really know how to describe it, other than that my moods feel steadier, like I'm not at risk of falling apart at any given second. My mind is calmer - I feel more capable or getting through the day and whatever comes with it. Even the rain isn't sending me into a tailspin, which it might have at one point.

I hope everyone's having a great week!


  1. I'm really glad to hear that your mood has been on the upswing, that's great! Hard to tease out how much is the meds and how much the social scene, but I'm sure both have a role...I wonder if some of it is your body being healthier too (meaning better nourished, as the return of the period signals, not weight related)? My anxiety and mood swings are definitely always worse when my body is in worse condition. Whatever the mix of causes, I'm really glad that everything is working for you; that's what's important!

  2. I'm also so glad to hear that the medication is helping! I agree with C that it might better nourishment might be helping as well as moods were a LOT less stable when I wasn't eating (and even now, if I skip a meal, WATCH OUT WORLD!) This is great news!! I'm proud of you for trying this out.