Life is just hard sometimes, man. I'm really missing my friends. It seems like every year more and more of them move away, and it gets harder and harder to make new ones. My friends have generally always come from classes, or just the general day-to-day of being in school. But now since the program is much smaller and I'm the youngest of my cohort by a few years, it just seems like no one is really in the same life stage as me; everyone goes home to their spouse/kids. I've never really done any clubs or student groups or anything, but I'm trying to get out there and meet some new peeps. I went to a graduate student event in a different part of the university the other night, and there's a happy hour one night next week. It was refreshing to meet people outside my department and I even met a guy but it's hard to say yet if any real friendships will materialize. It is not in my nature to be super forward about initiating relationships, but what have I got to lose, right? This TED talk makes me cry every time and I am trying so hard to live by this.
Isolation is death for me. Yes I am introverted and yes I need alone time and yes big crowds/wild parties/sloppy bars stress me out, but loneliness is worse. I can't handle it. I'm worried that the more I let myself isolate and bathe my brain in all the sad chemicals, the harder it'll be to pull myself out of an entrenched depression.
Hey, I'm really sorry to hear that you're still having a hard time. It's hard to see friends pack up and move away. I know you've already done a Master's degree, but for me it was a big shock going from undergrad to a grad program because there weren't so many formal ways (i.e., classes and clubs and labs) to bond with people. It was indeed isolating. It sounds like you're doing all the right things, though -- putting yourself out there at mixers and events. You are an awesome person and I know people will see that when they meet you; just give it a bit of time. I know it's hard in the interim, though. Always drop me a line if you're feeling lonely or low.
ReplyDeleteAlso when do we get details on this guy? ;p
thanks yeah it's definitely been a struggle. Another biggie has been the shift from having a roomie to living alone - that just wiped away one big source of daily social contact, you know? I like having my own place but it also can be tough when I just want to kick back and chat with someone without getting dolled up and going out. Anyway thanks, much love you ya - hope things are okay on your end.
DeleteI'm so sorry you're having a hard time with loneliness. It's a horrible feeling. I agree with you and Cammy about grad school being much more difficult of an environment to make friends. People come and go in grad school, and it's hard to even meet them. I'm really glad you've been getting out there and meeting people! I'm always here if you want to talk! Also, yeah, I need to hear about this guy!
ReplyDeleteThanks sweet lady. I'm tryin'. Stay tuned on the boy, we will hopefully be crossing paths again later this week...
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