Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Stormy Musings

Things have slowed wayyyy down after a crazy few weeks. I was traveling quite a bit at the beginning of the summer (home, conferences, visiting friends) then my mom was in town for a week for the 4th, I taught a class for a month (five hours a day, four days a week....BRUTAL) which just ended. Now I'm just finishing up grading final papers, and my advisor is out of town for the next two weeks which means FREEDOM.

The weather in College City abso-fucking-lutely sucks and I'm so over it. Weeks and weeks of brutal heat, plus almost daily rain/thunderstorms, plus out-of-this-world humidity = cranky Kaylee. Is it too much to ask for a moderately temperate climate, Midwest? Is it?!? Holy Jesus literally as I've been sitting here writing this, another thunderstorm just rolled in. GET ME OUT.

Otherwise, I suppose the biggest news from the past week is that I got a haircut (I LEAD A VERY EXCITING LIFE). My hair was sooooo long, like almost to my waist. I got four inches cut off, but of course my hair was so long to begin with that it's almost not even noticeable. I've been growing my hair out for about three years now with only periodic trims, so this was a semi milestone. Even though it doesn't really look all that different.

Each of these could probably be its own post, but as you can tell from my recent blogging habits, it would probably be overly ambitious of me to attempt that. So here are a few developments:

- I'm in a fight with my best friend. But...she doesn't know we're in a fight. In other words, I'm super annoyed with her for reasons that are too specific and complicated and longstanding to explain here, but haven't talked with her about it. So I'm stewing silently and being passive aggressive and distant. #maturity

- I'm having lots of insecurities about academic/professional/career stuff. This summer has been hard because I'm working on lots of random stuff for my advisor without any sense of compelling purpose. I'm not loving any of the projects I'm on right now, which has me feeling very ambivalent and half-hearted about my work. Plus I've gotten TWO manuscripts rejected by journals in the past month, and my self-confidence has taken a serious hit. I've been thinking about what it means to be in this field, fighting for publication and funding and tenure for the next decade at least, and questioning whether my present career/life plans are right for me.

- I joined OKCupid. God help us all.

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