I know that I barely post at all these days, and when I do it tends to be ANXIETYANXIETYANXIETY and not much else. Sorry. I have truly never been hit so hard by anxiety as I have in the past year. It's really hard to describe feeling so unsafe in your own head. It has waxed and waned a bit, but since about July or so, I have pretty much been consumed by anxiety. It's not that it always so terrible, but sometimes it is and I am constantly calibrating how my brain feels...is it going to be a good day? A terrible day? Do I need to call Mama Bear? Do I need to call Dr. P? Do I need to call Dr. New Psychiatrist? Do I need to suck it up and get a grip? Do I need to pop a Klonopin?
I'm doing better lately, mostly because the meds have been a game changer. I started on Celexa back in November and things improved dramatically with a few weeks, but that also coincided with me going on winter break and my stress level dropping to approximately zero. The spring semester has definitely been better than the fall, but over the past couple months my anxiety started rising again to pretty intolerable levels again. I doubled my dose of Celexa, but was still relying pretty heavily on the Klonopin. I have the Klonopin to take "as needed," but "as needed" was pretty much daily. So, my psychiatrist (I started seeing her last fall and I ADORE HER) just switched me to Prozac. For a week, I was tapering down the Celexa, then tapering up the Prozac, and I am supposed to take Klonopin daily to keep things under control in the transition - particularly since she warned me that Prozac can be "activating" in the beginning. Anyway, I've been on the Prozac for about a week or so with no real news to report, other than a little nausea and general tummy unhappiness. I was taking 1mg Klonopin daily last week, then decided to try going without and so far so good. So, cautious fist pump.
Anyway, I have about one week left of this insane semester and then things should settle down for a bit. Much love to all, hope this BRIEF update is enough to sustain you for a little.
Your Favorite Worst Blogger